efferescent:

remember when a girl from my school wore a dress the same color as the green screen at prom

oh yes

her date did too

asap-tran:

really-shit:

If your phone gets wet, try putting it in a bag of dry rice. At night, the rice will attract Asians who will fix your electronics for you.

fuck

so-many-feels:

deucebowl:

If I were a magic wizard I wouldn’t harm people when they pissed me off, I’d just put these really fucked up random curses on them, like every time they saw a school bus they would shit their pants, or every time someone said the word Thursday they would pretend they were a dragon for 20 seconds.

i think you would be a very good wizard.